I have over 30 unfinished posts now... this is getting out of hand... hopefully soon I'll get them wrapped up and posted... I need to get a laptop....

--El Lazyosaurus Rex

"In a world full of people, there's only some want to fly, Isn't that crazy?"
--Seal Crazy (punk version by Me First and the Gimmie Gimmies)

"In a world full of people, there's only some who want to fly, Isn't that crazy?"
--Seal Crazy (punk version by Me First and the Gimmie Gimmies)

I'm still feeling kinna sick which totally sucks. I hate being sick. I want to go skate and to go have fun. I am tired of taking it easy and trying to get better... erf. This has been going on far to long.

--El Sickofbeingsickosaurus

When I ran Cross Country back in high school a good friend of mine (Henry aka "Micky" Darius) turned me on to the band Ministry. Their 1990 live album "In case you didn't feel like showing up" is to this day one of my favorites. I warmed up for almost every single race my Jr. and Sr. year listening to the aggressive lyrics and beats and driving guitars that exist on that album. I get shivers whenever I hear any song from that album... Visions of pre-race jitters and post race exhaustion are vividly brought to mind when I hear that stuff... I used to get so pumped listening to that tape before races....

"I only kill to know I'm alive..." One of my favorite quotes from that CD became an anthem that we ran by... You'd be out on the course and one of your teammates would come up next to you and say those words to you and then it was on... It was like take off the gloves and get to it! Those words would ignite that inner fire... You'd dig as deep as you could... push things that extra bit harder... burn that last bit of energy you had left sitting deep down inside of you... take out all your weapons and charge that shit all guns blazing... yeah maybe it's a bit morbid... but when you are out there running in a race, chasing down opponents, it is kind of like hunting... Totally primal. Our team moto was "Join the hunt, or become the hunted" every time you passed someone during a race that was one more kill... One more victim that you had hunted down.. and you were still alive... and still on the hunt and still looking to "kill" to chase down the next victim. The quote inspired us... semi-twisted as that might be... It is amazing how much emotion went into every race.. how much energy... Lots of people have no idea what I'm talking about when I try to describe what running XC was like... I feel lucky to have experienced that emotion. I am glad that I know about those feelings and that I have experienced that energy. I think that is what drives me a little harder then the average person. I think that is were I learned to be passionate about the things in my life. I think that is were I grew up and became who I am today. I am truly lucky to have had such a great team and a great coach. And truly lucky to have met Henry, who turned me on to Ministry and was one of the OG 3d crew members. Good stuff. Join the Hunt....

Man it's been a long last 7 days... I am really tired of feeling sick... at least I'm finally starting to feel a bit better... slow on the go for sho' though... damn... There are so many things I'd rather be doing then sitting at home blowing my nose all the time.... I need some excercise... I need to get out and go skate soon. It's crazy that I still get that feeling inside when I haven't skated in a while... that burn... that desire... that feeling like I might go crazy if I don't step on my board soon... I'm pretty stoked that I still enjoy it so much... even though I haven't progressed in days...make that years... haha These days it's more like I'm just trying not to lose what I've got... haha damn again... but anyway, the drive is still there... and I'm really happy that I haven't lost that.

This is a crazy time in my life right now... so much going on... so many decisions being made... so much searching going on.... so much changing... it's nice that a few things are still solid for me. And don't get me wrong, things are awesome for me right now. I'm loving life and everthing that is going on in my life right now... but it is sometimes overwhelming... and it's good to be able to lean back on something that I know is always there... always consistant... always waiting and calling to me.... It's funny, when I was in 6th or 7th grade one of my friends asked me if I'd still ride a skateboard when I got into highschool.... I was like "yeah, why wouldn't I??! Skateboarding rules!?" but I remember thinking to myself on the inside "huh.. I dunno.. will I???" who would have guessed I'd stick with it for so long... I'm glad I have. Skate or die! haha Maybe it's Skate and live for me...

MW, 3D, FTP, Sabado, SAC, Sueno, RAC, SCR..... keep it real.

"A-K bustin I ride the whole clip
I cock that hoe and let it mother fuckin rip"

"Represent for the home team! Throw it up!
Throw it up Mother fucker throw it up!"

--Throw your hood up, Lil' Jon

some words of wisdom ya heard... haha

I've been sick for the last 5 days. Sick as a dog. All I have been doing is sleeping and playing GTA. That pretty much sucks.

"Well now they call me the breeze,
I keep blowin’ down the road!"
--Lynrd Skynyrd

Weekend In Review

Friday:
I played a lot of Grand Theft Auto on Friday. Then it was off to Walnut Creek to hang with the homies from SB. It was good to see everyone. We played some funny drinking games and everyone got sorta faded. Jon woke us all up for some crazy reason... I can't remember what that reason was but I remember thinking that it was funny and that Jon was a weirdo.

Saturday
We all went out to breakfast which was super fun. Then it was off to help out my GMA. After that I went to a short practice and then cruzed up to the house. Satnight was our (the band's) first show. We played this totally rad Dive bar called the Caravan! Los Ojos Diabolicos was in full effect! We dressed up in funny costumes and totally rocked out. Ruth got me an awesome gift: A water bottle with a funny picture on it and then a bottle of Jameson and a bottle of Sprite. I tried to drink a lot of the Jameson. Rad. A bunch of my friends showed up and that was awesome. It was really cool seeing everyone. I am lucky to have such awesome friends. DH bought us all shots before the show. I was feeling the flow for sure.... good stuff. It was rad. On the way back to RW we went to Jack in the box. It was the best food I had ever had. I was pretty drunk though so it might have actually tasted like crap. I wouldn't have known the difference.

Sunday
On Sunday we watched the video tape of the show and ate bagels. It was fun to watch. Then I went and skated for a bit and then came back home and chilled. Then it was off to dinner at Ruth's parents. Another awesome meal and lots of fun as usual. The End.